I’ve Made It…Time to Enjoy the Ride

I was recounting this story with a friend over a cup of coffee this morning and decided it was worth sharing here as well. Every once in awhile we should pause to appreciate what we really have created in our lives.

photo by mconnors

I remember visiting a friend’s house about seven years ago when my oldest was still just a baby. My husband and I were over there for dinner and to play some cards. When I walked through the door, I was immediately engulfed in warmth, savory smells and what sounded like a significantly sized pack of children tearing the house apart. After removing our coats in the mudroom, we headed for the kitchen where Kerry was simultaneously ladling what looked to be tuna casserole into a container while chatting on the phone. She smiled and gave us a quick wave to encourage us in further.

Meanwhile, their three elementary-aged daughters and friends pounded into the kitchen and asked for juice. While still on the phone she grabbed the pitcher from the fridge and doled out six cups, poured the juice,  and popped a sippy lid on each one. She got off the phone and asked her oldest daughter to take the casserole, some bread and a salad over to the neighbor’s house.

“She’s sick,” she told us by explanation.

Then she proceded to ask us what we wanted to drink and offer us some snacks until our prime rib was ready. Prime rib??? Really? As my mind wrapped around the thought of prime rib on a weeknight, I heard a couple more people enter the mudroom behind us.

I had only been to their home once before, and I glanced around now. It was clean, but had the lived-in clutter of a busy family. I turned back to the kitchen scene. Kerry seemed completely at ease as she chatted, joked and prepped our dinner. That night we ate well, played some poker and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. Most importantly, everyone was at ease and felt completely welcome. Not everything went perfectly, but I don’t even remember what those little imperfect moments were. I just remember the atmosphere of a busy family that didn’t feel strained or stressful. It was fun.

Since that night, I’ve always held Kerry up as a bit of an icon of what I wanted to become. This was the family life I wanted. My baby was sweet and soft and quiet, but I craved the bustle and organized chaos that I experienced in this home. I craved the ability to handle that organized chaos with the same grace and obvious love as Kerry did. She was superwoman in my eyes.

Let’s flash forward seven years…

I am in my kitchen having just had our neighbor, Janet, over for dinner. She has dinner at our home every week after she graciously spends time working with our 5-year-old son on his speech issues. I had made a cider pork roast and Janet and I were sitting back and chatting at the kitchen table which is a near miracle because the noise in the house was deafening. My childrens’ friends from down the street had popped in for a short visit as well and were currently playing tag around the circular floorplan of our home. Every 30 secondsor so, five children ranging from age ten to two pounded through the kitchen followed by an exhuberantly happy jack russell.

I felt my blood-pressure rising. I started to feel anxious and ready to pop when my mind suddenly flashed to that scene seven years prior. And I realized that this was it. I had arrived. This was the life I envisioned for my family. At one point in my life I craved this.

I now realize that I have no idea what Kerry was feeling the night we had prime rib. She seemed calm to me. But she could have been having an absolute coronary inside. She could have been wondering what in the hell she could have possibly been thinking having kids over, caring for a sick neighbor, plus making prime rib for 6 dinner guests. I know I do. I realize that my Monday night pork roast with Janet was not at that level, but I also know that we have had nights that weren’t far from it.

I glanced around my kitchen. It was clean but had the lived-in clutter of a busy family of five. Some days are better than others with regards to how clean it is. This was a good day.

I found myself taking a deep breath. Just enjoy it. I turned and looked at Janet.

“Would you like a glass of wine?”

Filed under Food, Life in General, Up Close and Personal |